Fleeting. Everything is…
Temporary and taken for granted. Most things are…
This is a universal, and can be upsetting if you dwell on it.
So, why do we take things for granted? Especially that, and those who are most important? The simple answer is because we get caught up in ourselves more than we don’t. We get tunnel vision about our own agendas, wants, and desires. Others then become secondary. Oh, we like to claim that we’re not selfish most of the time to make ourselves feel better, but that’s not really true. That’s not what the research says.
Truth is, most people don’t give two shits about most of what anyone else is doing. Most people’s primary focus is on themselves, first and foremost. While many claim to know this, most don’t apply this so-called common sense into their daily interactions. It requires heightened levels of objective self-awareness and social strategy skills.
I do an in-person and virtual talk called “Tuning Into WIIFM” where I discuss the communication strategies to apply to flip this process 180 degrees. I challenge audiences to meet others’ needs first, and then by doing so, their needs get met on back-end. Sounds simple, but is difficult to implement consistently. It requires ongoing awareness and diligence to the process. It becomes a choice… moment-to-moment literally.
Choose selflessness. It’s the nice thing to do, and it’s the right thing to do.
8 Steps to Get What You Want:
- Know exactly what it is you’re after and why. More Clarity = Less Chaos. It doesn’t have to be just one thing, but it does have to be clearly your thing(s).
- Be sure that what you want is something you’re both passionate about, AND have a legitimate talent for. Passion only = a hobby. Talent only = a job. Both = a calling. Get honest, and don’t bullshit yourself.
- Be able to help solve others’ problems with your passion and talent. Everyone’s favorite subject is themselves. So, at the core, your offering has to be about them; not you.
- Be willing and able to consistently work extremely hard despite how you feel at any given moment. I don’t care what anyone says, working toward “success” is fucking hard work. Chuck the excuses, and DO the work required to kick ass.
- Be willing and able to consistently work extremely smart. Always be learning new strategies and implementing new ideas to get farther, faster. If you think you’ve arrived… you definitely haven’t.
- Master the art and science of Communichology™ by knowing when and how to speak up, when to shut up, and how to do both professionally and with integrity ongoing. Copious amounts of self-awareness, social and emotional intelligences are non-negotiable skills sets to seek and master.
- Be actively assessing where and what you need recovery from, and where you need to improve… and we all need it somewhere, sometimes. And then commit to doing what needs to be done to fucking overcome and rise above.
- Repeat #1-8.
In recent years, there’s been a lot of chatter out there, and it’s become quite trendy to talk about the importance of self-awareness. I think it’s cool that this subject-matter is finally getting the attention it deserves because it’s so damn important. This shit NEEDS to be taught in schools, right along with the immediate next level concept of >> situational awareness (that’s another post all together)… Most infamously, Gary Vaynerchuk is all over his vast social media empire incessantly preaching about the importance of self-awareness. And I’m glad because the dude has a huge reach, and a shit-ton of good insights to share.
But increased self-awareness is just the beginning. This must be quickly followed up with specific actions to accentuate and enhance the identified positives and then deemphasize and reduce the negatives in order for any of it to produce any tangible results. Awareness without action is only half the equation for success. What’s the point of knowing, if you’re not committed to doing anything positive with what you know…?